I’m still taking easy – a bit sore and tired – but wanted to take a moment to thank everyone for the well wishes and the love. We are feelin’ it all! Oh, and go here to see a newborn pic that my friend Jeanette took of Indi a few days ago.
Indi is a gentle soul: mellow, wise, and a divinely succulent creature to nuzzle and nurse. We are working out a kink or two with cloth diapering and co-sleeping (i.e. we need a bigger bed!) but I can’t stop feeling like I’m in a dream when I see her sweet face next to mine in the new-morn light. I had somehow forgotten how blissful the newborn stage is, how pure it feels to hold your fresh child in the palm of your hands, knowing they were within the sanctity of your womb just days prior. As I kiss and rub my face against hers, I feel primal and instinctively protective. I even had a bit of a tough time washing the “birth” off of her two days ago – somehow fiercely attached to even those little swatches of dried blood on her fuzzy head.
I still can hardly believe it: born at home. Born at home, born at home, born at home. The words alternate between sounding foreign in my mouth to at last sinking in as sweet as sugar as if they have always belonged there, coursing through my body. Life has come full circle in just under two years. When I replay the birth journey of just five days ago in my mind, I am stunned that I did it – that WE did it – and feel victorious in a place of true peace. I am surrounded by spiraling, loving energy.
Big sister Kaia is a sweetheart, only having select moments of jealously, particularly in the morning when she just wants Mamatime. I have teared up more than once as I notice how much she has grown; quickly evidenced by how heavy she feels in my arms now, how she towers in stature compared to Indi, how her innocence shines through. She has enjoyed the added bonus increased attention from Daddy, becoming his right-hand gal, his partner-in-crime.
Speaking of Dad, his girls have him wrapped! Watching him love and nurture them melts my heart. A few nights ago, I heard him whisper to Indi as he cuddled her close. He was telling her how much he loved his girls and how he has a big job as a Daddy to set a good example of what it means to be a real man. And when he says “real man”, I rest totally easy because I know he means the kind of man we all want our girls to fall in love with, to connect with on a deep soul level. A man like her Mama loves. A man like him.